Breaking in my Dream Stoop

Part of street skating is drinking beer on stoops. Someone people might disagree, but they're chi-gwai. After years of semi-antisocial behavior in Taipei, I certainly developed a catalogue of preferred stoops. I've drank beer sitting on curbs, on marble ledges, in front of churches, in alleys, at seven's, on quiet streets, on loud and busy streets, in parks, by handrails, by public toilets, all up and down linsen bei, nearby the house and far far far away from home. I've always been partial to roof stoops, partly for the rhyme, but mostly for the view and the breeze and the superiority I feel over all the people who aren't skating Taipei and drinking beer after on a roof.

A series of personal disasters has made this a bad month, but at least one dream came true: my own personal penthouse roof stoop. For those who don't know, most older buildings in Taiwan have a sort of fungal appartment growth on the top. These places are cheap, because they're illegal (maybe unregulated is the better word) and they're hot in the summer, if they're not properly insulated, which they aren't, because they're not regulated. I'll solve that problem when I get to it. For now, I have a roof top entirely to myself.

Unfortunately, having started a new job, I haven't made time to move all my shit, and I rather romantically decided to move my skateboard last. I haven't had time to skate much, but then I haven't had the heart to either. So I missed the session. IS and the mysterious jumpro went to the bridge, and made their way over here when the lights went out. We hauled a couple of dozen beers up six flights of stairs and to my delight, found out jumpro is someone with whom I can get along. We drank beer and chatted on the roof until we ran out of etoh. Jumpro is flying out for work, and I'm flying out for family shit. IS is doing all the skating. I hope RMJ gets some sessions in while I'm gone. One week in the motherland during the onset of winter is going to suck. It's about 30-40 degrees colder than here.

Normalg Dreams of Skateboarding

I was back in America. It was the same time of year as now, and it was cold enough to need a jacket. I was giong to try and skate to various skatespots, only, they're so far apart. In teh states. I had several spots in mind - one of them was at the secret ledge in Jiantan, which makes about as much sense as a Salvador Dali painting, but the second spot was the long winding hill at Hog Mountain, that runs the length of the 18 hole golf course. We used to bomb it, back before traffic thickened up, out there in the country side. To my delight, the curbs down the whole thing, at least a mile of it, had been painted by City of Taipei. First, there were sections of yellow and black stripes, then about half way, it was just grey. I needed wax, so I went into the Home Depot but it was packed from floor to ceiling with shit, like a 五金 store, with the blue and white flipflops, the green and red brooms, the unlabeled, uninventoried heaps and stacks and shelves and piles of every kind of thing you can imagine. CC was working there, and I was delighted to see him. He sold me a case of Gulfwax, which was in a container like somekind of suitcase, and each individual brick of wax was wrapped up like chocolates that Taiwanese people give relatives. I wandered out and drank a beer. It was a beautiful blue sky day, windy and kind of chilly. A cop car drove by, and I was startled to realize that I can't drink beer in public here. I tried to grab my wax and backpack and skateboard and dash into the woods, but hte pinestraw was slippery and I feel down. How am I think drunk from only one beer? I thought. It was so dark in the woods. The smell of pinestraw was strong. The cop car was shining it's spotlight through the trees, looking for me. I realized that the fall had dislodged one of my teeth, a lateral incisor on the right side. I regrettably pulled it out of my gums and it was filthy and grey, with black splotches. Horrified, I tried to check if the others were ok, but they weren't. My teeth were crumbling like chalk, and the peices were covered in grey and black slotches, like mold on rotting fruit. As I touched them, my entire mouth came out of my face, like a solid unit: upper and lower jaws, with tongue and palate attached, inbetween. I was holding this fleshy monstrosity, unsure what to do, when I remembered this skatespot in the bottom of a ravine that I had dreamt of before. I buried my tongue and teeth beneath the pinestraw, and wondered it someone would find it and think I had been murdered there. On the other side of the woods was my old appartment complex from college. I decided to cut through it, to save time. I knew I probably looked like a maniac skateboarding hobo, since my mouth was missing. I heard some people talking about me, and then some authority saying yes, it really was me, I used to live there. I got lost in some kind of larger building, and security started following me at a distance. They were slowly surrounding me, but then I found the exit by mouthing the word at a terrified resident. She pointed and I threw down and pushed hard down the hallway. I got through the hospital sliding doors and just had to pop down a curb but something went wrong and I slammed. My wallet must have fallen out then and the wind blew my money out of the wallet. Red and blue bills scattered like confetti, and I ran and jumped, trying to catch some. Otherpeople were catching them too, and I was trying to yell that it was mine, but they thought I was just some crazy hobo. A man waded up some of my money into a softball sized ball, then they started playing catch with it. I was in tears, beggining them, please no, like monkey in the middle. They gave it to me and I laid on the ground, holding the money ball and crying. Then I'm not sure whathappened. The cops came, I hopped through a gap in the fence, and I rolling again, on rough american asphalt. I got back to the old house at Hog Mountain and my wooden 8x8 rail was there, so I ******* it for old times sake. This spongebob board is getting really haggard, so I thought about maybe focusing it, so I wouln't have ot carry it back to Taiwan, but I've never focused a board in my life, so I wondered if maybe I could kill it with some *********s in my 1990s driveway.

lowei and loneliness

I've been getting off work around 22:00 lately, which limits food options. Tonight I made in important discovery. The best and cheapest 滷味 in Taipei. There's a dumpy neighbhorhood near mainstation and the other night, I noticed a late night set up in front of a crumbling brick wall, with some plastic stools and metal tables. Things are piled up all around, so it's hard to tell what's trash and rubble, and what's actually part of this open air food heaven. The owner had one arm, and even at 02:00, every seat was full on a weeknight. They had beer (both kinds, jinpin AND classic). It looked so awesome that I saved teh pin but I didn't make it back for a couple of days. Some thuggish old dudes were stacking up bottles and playing a dice game. A man happily told me to have a good meal as I sat down. It was a perfect meal, and it cost $45. I struggled to order because even if I have guessed what they sold, I didn't know much of the words. Of course there is no menu, and of course they don't even have the ubiquitous red basket to put your selection in. You just tell her, and she makes it. I finally spit out that I wanted "some kind of soup, any soup is good." There is no way to make food as cheap as that at home. I think I'll just go there every night after work. Maybe I can learn how to be an old man from teh old men there. And since it's open air seating, it's really perfect for post skating. I bought a couple of cans for later at seven, and hiked up the six flights to my rooftop hideaway. It's peaceful up here, dark and quiet, but not too dark, and the traffic noise never totally dies away but never gets really loud either, except when a scootard roars down my alley with aftermarket exhaust, sounding like a two wheeled chainsaw through a loudspeaker. I guess that's what you get when you live in the hood. 

Anon Makes a Connection

Previously, I wandered down the river to CC's bar. I drank too many 9% and was seeing double by the end of hte night. IS was there and bought me some more 9%, which rurnt my seeing. CC rode me back on his scooter, because he's that kind of dude. I woke up mostly not hung over, which was good, because I had to work. I worked and it sucked. Then I went back to the new place, which is to be charitable, a penthouse on the top floor in a trendy neighborhood. There are downsides, but I'll get to those later. As I stood blasting Helmet's Aftertaste into my ears, I became aware of a skater with a dog on the crowded sidewalk. As he crossed the road, I realized it was JF. He gave me a hug. His dog is a tiny brown weiner dog. His skateboard is a cruiser deck. He said, "why are you wearing a tie? You nerd." We chatted while the light was red, and he explained he was looking for his bike because he drank slightly too much the night before and couldn't remember where he had left it. I know it's a nice bike, because he rides it to the bridge. I was just about to send him a line msg and say I hope he found it, but I don't have his line anymore. So I'm writing this. I went to mandarin lessons, and a japanese lesson, in case this trial seperation is permanent. If so, I'm giong to japan, because the air doesnt make me cough and I can sort of speak the langauge already. JP adn rmj and a slew of other people are skating the city tonight, but I have a fever, so I'm holed up at the new place. Happy Birthday, Lzyk. I'm so miserable without you that it's almost like having you here.

Angel of Death Rides Through

I got off work and hit up the izakaya next door. Perks of getting dumped. I bought some beers from seven and eventually ran out. I went down six flights to get more, but even before I set foot o nthe stairs,  I could tell the city was beset with a layer of white, stinking pollution. In the course of drinknig a few beers, teh air outside went from crystal clear to so foggy with pm2.5 that even the street lights on teh same block were hazy and nebulous. Some fools here are still antinuclear power. It's hard to believe they think that a nuclear accident would be worse than what's happening now. If they build a coal plant here, I think I have ot leave.

Anon Misses a Connection

Be me.
On the way to work.
Tie and briefcase.
Skater cruises up. Laowai.
Hey what's up man? Do you skate at the bridge? Haven't seen you before.
Looks me from head to toe and back.
Skates off.

Godspeed.

$b on the roof

I cancelled class this morning with the D, cause I would have sucked hard at working. One on one is so intense. I went back to sleep, having dreamed about lyzk, and woke up around noon. I eventually wandered outside and had an onionpancake and bought a dehumidifier. I cancelled all work, because I could. I fell asleep at six and woke up at eight thirty, so I missed the trash truck. I went to an izakaya next door and got comped some sympathy beers, "because [I] looked sad." They played Avril 14th on the speakers, and I watched the cars and scooters and buses rush by out of hte window. I lined up a lot of language exchanges, to keep busy. I listened to $B on the roof at length and drank some asahis. I have a great view of orion wandering across the sky here. It's a peaceful house.

skateboarding saves lives

having been instructed to move out, i found a place and started moving there. It's a weeknight, but IS still made the time to come help me move my pitiful pile of shit from Lzyk's place to my new one. The taxi pretended to not know where to go, and then we drank some  beers on the roof. I paid him in shoes and a gobstopper deck. We drank enough beers than I puked into the grate downstairs, but not til he had already caught  a taxi. We talked about skatespots from 20 years ago, and skatespots in the city now, and now I feel a lot braver than when I was at the old place. Breaking up is hard to do (dont take your love, away from me) i bought some household essentials. It's eh, empowering, but also feels like shooting my dog in the face. after I puked, I watched cmilk and whatshisname ride scooters around her home town. I'm so worried about her that I cleaned and fixed the bathoroom fan at the old house. My number one concern is that she is going get through this. In a way, that makes me feel proudly mature. Jesus christ almighty, never get married unless they really want to.

There's no right side of the bed with a body like mine and a mind like min

I skated to main station with tears in my eyes, on drying asphalt. Warmed up the stifflingly humid night with tons of ***s, *****-**s and ********s. I guess I'm guess I'm giving up on doing 100 everynight. This seems like as good a time as any. MH got there first. There was no miscommunication on our line group, but we all eventually wandered into the same area. That happened to be the pink marble banks at main station. They grind, if your wheels are small. And they **** *****, if you're IS. NLS came too along too, with TW, and CC as well. An angry homeless woman in a powder blue top came over to yell at us for not carrying enough speed through our grinds and for not popping the *******s enough (sorry everybody, I suck). She ranted around the block a few times and then we went to the plaza at ximen. A half a dozen other skaters were already there, one of who looks like a watermelon. They already had the double cones stacked up (MFing IS ******ed those bitches, after he ******* the stairs, and for once, I looked over at exactly the right time to see both of them. it was that kind of session; everything came together in an emotionally satisfying way). We skated teh 2001 black monolith ledge in the back until we assumed we would get kicked out, but we never did. I sang angry songs to myself and pushed around in circles. I got my longest ***** there (something about the loss of a given fuck when things are darkest can make some actually not bad skateboarding). The session wound downwith one by one leaving, and RMJ buying my water (because I forgot my walltet) and several beers (because I can't afford beer until pay day). At some point, FA was keen to arrive and slammed on his first trick. We sat aroudn talking, them reassuringly to me, and me obnoxiously because I'm more than a little awkward. We discussed (I shouted at them) dyson spheres and khardeshev civs, and eventually, we split up and I pushed home trough the drizzle, playing drugs and skengs on my speaker phone. Having arrived home and showered, I'm rather soberly realizing that this is likely to be the last night lzyk and I stay in the same place. Eight years gone.


I guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far as we go. i guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far was we go. I guess this isa far as we go. I guess this is as far wa we go. I guess this is a far sa we go. I guess this is as far waws we go. I guess this is as far as we go. I guess this is as far wsa we go. I guess this is as far as we go.